After weeks and weeks of drought in not seeing Shahdi in any of my dreams (which I could remember when awake), it seems my luck has finally turned since last week because I saw her again in my dream last night. And, for the first time since her death, I actually was able to talk to her. The feeling was out of this world, magnificent, ecstatic!
In my dream, Shahdi had been sleeping for a long time, for weeks, maybe even months. We all were wondering what to do to wake her up from her deep slumber. Mehrdad was there; so were my parents and Arman. All of a sudden the door opens and a few of her friends walk in to visit Shahdi, and shortly afterwards Shahdi wakes up, ready to leave with her friends. Before she left, I managed to spend a few minutes with her, to give her a long tight embrace while whispering into her ear that she was the most beautiful, intelligent, kind and loving daughter and how I loved her and how happy I was that she was finally awake and looking well. She returned my hugs and gave me her pretty smile. It felt so good to be able to tell her how I had missed her and loved her. After that, like most concerned mothers, I asked her to eat something before leaving with her friends and Mehrdad was going to get her one of her favorite food. I don’t remember the rest of my dream but when I woke up, I realized it was the first time in the last fourteen months that I was actually able to tell Shahdi how much we loved and missed her. I wish I could tell her that in person.
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