Rain

Rain is generally considered a blessing by most people on this planet whether there is a water shortage or not. I am no exception. I used to love the summer rain because that meant I did not have to water my outdoor flower beds, our grass would look even greener than normal, and my car would get a free rinse. The only time I did not appreciate the rain was in the winter when there was the possibility of it turning the roads into an ice rink and causing fatal accidents. 

With the arrival of spring this year and the spring showers, I noticed my attitude towards rain had dramatically shifted. I no longer cherished it. I abhorred it! For a simple reason: now that my Shahdi is sleeping in a coffin underground, I do not wish her coffin to be flooded with muddy water. This is the reason I could not sleep well in the last couple of nights because the sound of the pouring rain made me think of my Shahdi and her condition, and that thought kept me awake. As I was driving in heavy rain yesterday and today, the entire time my mind was circulating around Shahdi’s corner at the Lincoln Memorial Park. I suppose I am turning into a crazy bereaved mother!

When I was young, one of my most favorite activities was to ride my bicycle in the rain during the long summer vacations and to feel the raindrops and the wind on my skin as I was racing downhill in the company of my friends. It truly was such an invigorating experience. However, now, the summer rain has lost its beauty for me and become an unwelcome guest where Shahdi resides.

I miss the apple of my eye, my affectionate daughter…